Tiny Handcuffs

Someone once said a wedding ring is the tinest pair of handcuffs so chose your partner wisely. 


For months now that saying has rattled around in my head nonstop. 

I have no clue why but just the thought of marriage now scares me. What if he is only with me for the kids? What if he doesn’t really love me? Am I ok with the rest of my life being like this? 

I love my partner with all of my heart and I am in love with him. But what if he really doesn’t feel the same? I think everyone goes through this when in a serious relationship and not married yet. 

People say marriage is just a piece of paper but for me it’s so much more.

It’s choosing to change who I am my name and all to become one with you. It’s choosing to love you and only you, it’s choosing to promise to be by your side through the worst and best of times, it’s choosing to love someone so much more than yourself that you would bind yourself for enternity to them. 

For me marriage is so much more than a piece of paper. My ring symbolizes so much more than what people think. 
I’m just scared he won’t want me to be his partner and is with me for the wrong reasons. That he’d marry me and second guess himself and not want to be handcuffed together by the tinest cuffs. 

I guess with deployment coming up I am on edge.
Thanks for reading,


Lindsey


Learning to have a Healthy MarriageĀ 

Wanna know the key to a happy and healthy relationship? Keep it private. Keep it off social media. Never let anyone know when your home is unhappy because that’s an invitation for people to interfere. Don’t post about fights online or financial troubles, heck don’t even talk to people in person about it, unless it’s your family or one close friend and even then don’t tell too much into it. Dustin and I may fight and argue but it’s never too bad and I only vent to one person and that’s usually my sister who is never really listening anyways. You will never see anything but happiness and smiles on Facebook or Instagram because I learned my lesson with my past relationship with posting about your personal drama online. It invites unwanted visitors into it. 


Communicate. I cannot stress this enough. Don’t push them away(a bad habit I have) or bottle it up (another habit) or be passive aggressive (yet again) be open with each other. Talk about your day, any emotions you may be feeling, anything they’ve done to make you mad or unhappy or sad or anything, just talk to them be open. I cannot tell you how effective it is for you and your partner and how it will help avoid petty fights and arguments. Try not to raise your voice or lose control of your emotions.       

If you have kids or are a blended family like mine, parenting styles for the two of you may be different, and that’s okay. Try to come together and try different things to see what works for both of you and what you both agree on. Dustin and I are still working on this.


And lastly don’t forget the little things. A kiss goodbye and I love before heading out to work in the morning can do miracles for anyone’s day. Plan a movie night where you just order pizza and veg out in bed watching stupid comedies on Netflix. Plan a family fun day where you can go to the park and while the kids play you and your partner can have some much needed conversation time. Guys bring her a flower just a cheap one or one you picked or some food I promise she will love it and brighten her day, ladies watch the game with him or pick up the controller and let him teach you how to play, or make him his favorite dessert it’s always a nice surprise. 

Don’t forget you guys are a team. Don’t let anyone disrespect your partner because that’s disrespecting you too. Don’t forget you guys have goals of your own and together. Don’t forget to slow down sometimes and just enjoy each other’s company, cuddles and love. Just don’t forget to be in love. Take it from someone who’s had relationship after relationship flop, and finally tried something different and is finally happy.
Thanks for reading,

Lindsey